Rocko the Dog

Rocko (puppeteer Bruce Hunter), is a foul-mouthed, chain-smoking Miniature Schnauzer who formerly worked on a children's television programme. The job required him to control his language and behaviour, but eventually a berserk outburst on set ended his career. He takes medication to temper his violent mood swings.

Cuddles the Comfort Doll

Cuddles (puppeteer Bob Martin) is a comfort doll designed to help people cope with their problems. However, as the introductory voice-over to each episode informs the viewer, it is Cuddles who is now the problem. The chronic subordination of his own needs to those of others caused him to explode one day, grab a rifle, and start shooting. Despite this eruption, Cuddles is generally the best behaved of the group, although his naivete often gets him and his fellow residents at the halfway house into trouble. He cannot handle pressure well, lacks self-assertiveness, and shows signs of a passive-aggressive personality disorder.

Buttons the Bear

Buttons (puppeteer James Rankin) is a teddy bear with eyes consisting of two buttons. Unlike the others, Buttons is not so much a killer as a lover. In fact, he is a womanizer with no sense of sexual propriety who is remarkably successful in attracting eager human females. Buttons lives by the hedonistic motto "if it feels good, do it". He once had a lucrative corporate sponsorship deal with the Happy Elf Peanut Butter Company, but the sponsor exercised the "moral turpitude" clause in his contract once details of his promiscuous behaviour leaked to the press.

Bill the ventriloquist Dummy

Bill (puppeteer Gord Robertson) is a ventriloquist's dummy with a menacing smile and psychopathic tendencies. Fifty-eight of his partners have died in "accidents". Bill's nemesis is the Rasputin-like Curious Bob (John Hemphill), a former partner whom Bill has unsuccessfully attempted to murder on four occasions. In an episode featuring Bill's trial, his adoptive mother relates facts about his past that indicate the possible sources of his homicidal vengefulness; for example, that Bill had some bowel problems as a child and would defecate in his pants, thus earning him the nickname "poopy pants" from his peers. Bill also has a small penis and oddly shaped gonads which his maker gave him in order to encourage humility but which instead produced only more humiliation for Bill, perhaps explaining his gruesome hobby of collecting the testicles of men who have somehow been mysteriously deprived of them. Bill was at some point castrated himself, and is now a eunuch.

Dan Barlow

Dan Barlow is a social worker who runs the halfway house where the puppets live but who shows himself ill-suited to his particular vocation. He has difficulty with his own moral compass, finds himself easily swept up in events, and often makes poor decisions. Although he genuinely cares about his charges, Dan's primary concern is keeping the halfway house open thus preserving his job.

Season one

1. "Pilot" (first broadcast January 30, 2000) Dan meets with four puppet clients and finds that each of them has deeply rooted psychological problems. Rocko decides to help a children's show host get a kidney for a large amount of money but is frustrated at how difficult it is to achieve his goal. Buttons, at Dan's behest, seduces a woman who could make or break the halfway house.
2. "Buttons, The City Councillor And The City Councillor's Wife" (October 11, 2002)
3. "Cuddles Goes To Jail" (October 18, 2002)
4. "Buttons Goes To Court" (October 25, 2002)
5. "Bill's Brain" (October 31, 2002)
6. "The Island Of Skip-Along Pete" (November 8, 2002)
7. "Rocko's Telethon" (November 15, 2002)
8. "Cuddles The Safety Mascot" (November 22, 2002)
9. "Dan's Crush" (November 29, 2002)
10. "Dash The Greeter" (December 6, 2002)
11. "Cuddles Gets Laid" (December 13, 2002)
12. "Dan's Umbrella" (December 20, 2002)
13. "Mr. Quigley, The Asshole Next Door" (December 27, 2002)
14. "The Payback" (January 3, 2003)

Season two

1. "Bill Sues" (January 30, 2004)
2. "Portrait Of Buttons" (February 6, 2004)
3. "Prostitutes For Jesus" (February 13, 2004)
4. "Cuddles The Demon" (February 20, 2004)
5. "Buttons And The Geriatric" (February 27, 2004)
6. "Dead Ted" (March 5, 2004)
7. "Cuddles The Religious Icon" (March 12, 2004)
8. "Bill's Got The Blues" (March 19, 2004)
9. "Pizza Boys Are Missing" (March 26, 2004)
10. "Rocko Gets A Lung" (April 2, 2004)
11. "Dan And The Necrophiliac" (April 9, 2004)
12. "Rocko And The Twins" (April 16, 2004)
13. "The Twilight Place" (April 23, 2004)

Season three

1. "Buttons On A Hot Tin Roof" (February 11, 2005)
2. "Cuddles The Manchurian Candidate" (February 18, 2005)
3. "Buttons The Dresser" (February 25, 2005)
4. "Gus The Arsonist" (March 4, 2005)
5. "Rocko's Politician" (March 11, 2005)
6. "Buttons And The Paternity Suit" (March 18, 2005)
7. "Dan And The Bird Flu" (March 25, 2005)
8. "The CBC Is Killing Again" (April 1, 2005)
9. "The Lovely Fred" (April 8, 2005)
10. "The Amazing Bill" (April 15, 2005)
11. "Button's Big Fat Greek Wedding" (April 22, 2005)
12. "Cuddles The Artist" (April 29, 2005)
13. "Dan And The New Neighbour" (May 6, 2005)

Season four

1. "The Joyride" (March 2, 2006)
2. "Dan And The Garden Shears" (March 9, 2006)
3. "Mr. Big" (March 16, 2006)
4. "Dan Is Dead" (March 23, 2006)
5. "Bill And The Berkowitz's" (March 30, 2006)
6. "Oedipus Dan" (April 6, 2006)
7. "Buttons And The Dying Wish Foundation" (April 13, 2006)
8. "Bill's Wedding" (April 20, 2006)
9. "The Rival House" (April 27, 2006)
10. "The Hostage" (May 4, 2006)
11. "A Few Feuds" (May 11, 2006)
12. "Dan's Ideal Woman" (May 18, 2006)
13. "Buttons The Ghost" (June 22, 2006)